Last month we were approached by The Allstate Foundation. They asked if we would be interested in helping spread the word about Purple Purse, what it means and who it helps. A couple of weeks prior I had been sitting quietly in the dark after putting my little one to bed pondering my mother who I lost nearly two years ago.
We had a rough relationship as drugs and bad choices in men were a constant battle for her and I spent much of my life hating, fearing and judging her “choices”. It was only in death, when all the anger started to subside that I was able to see my mother in a different light. Not someone who disappointed me, but as a woman who tried desperately to get away from the men who beat her, fed her drugs to keep her there and controlled every penny so even if she wanted to get out, there was no real way to leave.
As I sat quietly in the dark pondering my mother and how I had treated her all those years, I wondered how I could use this platform we have created with MomSmack to honor her. To make up, maybe somehow just a little, for my judgement and lack of compassion. I wanted to pay tribute to the fact that as a grown woman I have come to understand that she tried so very hard to be better. She didn’t want to have her jaw wired shut after being thrown down the stairs, she didn’t want black eyes or bruises. She didn’t want her children to look at her like she was less than. She wanted out. She wanted to be empowered. She wanted a life of freedom and dreams. She never figured out how to get out and her life, right up until the end, was controlled by men who preyed on her inability to find a way to leave.
When The Allstate Foundation called I couldn’t believe the kismet. That whole “put it out to the universe and the universe will bring it to you thing” might just have some merit after all. Or perhaps my mother was looking in on me from wherever you go when you leave this earth and she heard my plea that night. Perhaps her final chapter will be her voice speaking through me changing the lives of other women who are living the same torturous life she did. Maybe together we can make a difference.
With that let us introduce you to Allstate Foundation Purple Purse program. We hope that you will join us in supporting this incredible program. We hope desperately if you or anyone you know is in need, this will be the start of a journey to freedom.
In 98% of all domestic abuse situations, financial abuse is used to keep the victim in the relationship. It’s incredibly difficult to make the decision to leave an abusive relationship. You blame yourself. It’s not them, it’s you. If you only try harder, be quieter, care more. We have all heard the stories. Imagine you finally garner the strength and courage to leave but don’t have the means to support yourself and kids? How can you go if you can’t provide food or a place to live?
78% of Americans say they have never heard of financial abuse. The abuser limits and controls the victim’s access to any banking and family finances. No credit cards, no easily accessible cash, hiding financial information and not allowing them access to bank accounts. Lack of financial knowledge, awareness and resources is the NUMBER ONE reason victims stay. If we can bring awareness to financial abuse, we can help stop it and help women find a way out.
The Allstate Foundation Purple Purse is an awareness and fundraising campaign aimed at creating long-term safety and security for survivors through financial empowerment. They are making the invisible visible. Bringing financial abuse out of the shadows so victims can get the healing and support they deserve.
The program ignites fundraising for hundreds of national, state and local domestic violence organizations. Funds raised will support life-changing financial empowerment services to help domestic violence survivors build safer lives for themselves and their families. They have invested more than $43 million to empower women to break free from abuse.
We hope that after reading this post you are wondering, “How can I help?” How can I raise awareness and become someone who helps empower victims to take control of their own financial situation. MomSmack and The Allstate Foundation Purple Purse are here to guide you. This month we are asking that you click the links. Get to know the facts. Read the stories of the survivors.
Next month we will be heading to New York to the unveiling of this year’s Purple Purse alongside the wonderful Kerry Washington who is the Ambassador for this program. The purse represents financial freedom. It represents the idea that women can take control of their own finances and finally be able to walk away from abuse, find their freedom and realize their dreams.
October will be a very special month where we can all become active in saving the lives of these women who need our help. We look forward to working with all of you on this very special project. Stay tuned for much more!